You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning by Rivenbark, Celia instant download

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning by Rivenbark, Celia instant download

242 pages ; 22 cm, A collection of humorous essays in which Celia Rivenbark shares her views on various aspects of life in the South, discussing perfect school attendance, Clay Aiken, Jesus action figures, Gwyneth Paltrow, and other topics. Includes recipes, TB or not TB : perfect attendance nuts don't care -- Poseable Jesus meets Poser Ken -- Let's go see \"Gobbler\" up at the funeral home -- High school musical triumphs : dreams 1, snot 0 -- Miss North Carolina is too nice to hate -- My manservant can kick your ass -- Playing \"the bingo\" with a-Cissy and a-Bobby -- Airlines serving up one hot mess -- Gladys Kravitz would've loved her some Facebook -- Gwyneth Paltrow wants to improve your pathetic life -- Jon & Kate plus 8 better without the kids -- Clay Aiken ain't marrying your glandular daughter -- What? Your preacher doesn't stand on a bucket? -- Chances of getting in the hall of fame? Very rare -- When Celia met Sally : a convertible love story -- I want to be a Margo, but I'm really a Sha-nae-nae -- It is what it @#$%^-ing is -- Lessons taught here -- The wrestler and the fan -- No TV? I'll put my carbon footprint up your behind -- Checkerboard dreams : shaggin' with the (sorta) stars -- Get yer wassail on, it's carolin' time -- Sex every night for a year? How do you wrap that? -- Japanese moms, meet most honorable Uncrustables -- Strapped for cash? Try cat whisperin' -- Mamas, don't let your sons grow up to be cheaters -- Epilogue : the future is bloody well decided : or is it?